After what amounted to nearly a week off ofmy training schedule, this week has been my best week of working out ever. I'm running faster and longer. Even my swimming has been better this week--less flailing and gasping for air, not to mention fewer weird looks from other people at the pool. I'm still not convinced I'll ever be ready to participate in a real triathlon (mostly because of the swimming bit. I mean, my starting point was practicing putting my face under the running water in the shower because I hate getting my face wet so much.)
Still, I'm glad every day that I'm doing this, and for totally different reasons than I expected. I've always thought sports activities were kind of mindless, but while running, biking, and swimming themselves are not particularly intellectually stimulating, I'm learning things about myself that I never would have if I weren't trying this out. The main thing I've learned is that I am not a disciplined person. I've always kind of thought that I was--I mean, it is hard to do as well in grad school as I did or play the violin as well as I did without having some discipline, right? I'm realizing that discipline for those activities didn't come at a very high price for me, though. There wasn't much pain or suffering involved that I had to get past. I didn't really have to give up much to do them, and I gained a lot from both. Even if they required some self-discipline, there are so many areas of my life that I lack discipline that there is no way on God's great earth I could characterize myself as a disciplined person. I've spent my entire life hitting the snooze button multiple times in the morning, sometimes on more than one alarm clock. I have yet to establish a daily devotional routine for myself. I can't even manage to practice often enough to play pieces for church as well as I ought to (and could), and they're easy. I've backed down from seriously pursuing some things I'm good at, telling myself I'm not competitive. I'm kind of starting to wonder whether I'm not really just a wimp.
That's the kind of excuse I've been giving myself my entire life. Take sports-type stuff.
I never had any interest in sports growing up, and when I came in last in required phys ed activities, I told myself I just wasn't an athletic person. I am learning that athletes aren't born, they're made. Okay, genes have some role in the making of an olympic-class athlete, but I am willing to bet that there are tons of run-of-the-mill amateur marathoners and triathletes who suffer from asthma and horrible allergies like I do, for example. I don't know where I got into my head that getting a stitch in my side after a few laps meant I wasn't meant to be an athletic person. Stopping because of the stitch in my side made me an unathletic person.
Even after years of going to the gym, I don't think I'd ever learned to really push myself. Now I have goals, and I've learned I can go much farther and faster than I thought I could if I just put my mind to it. It's nice to see learning some discipline has helped me get a little more fit. Maybe it will help in some other areas of my life.
Posted by waltondammerung at April 7, 2007 9:36 PM*sigh* SO great to read your post, hooch. I knew that you had it in you, but it's something that every person has to find out for herself :-) Take it from the formerly 170lb girl -- it's possible! Now, if only I can apply some of that discipline to writing...grrrr.....
Posted by: Kwin at April 7, 2007 10:59 PM"but while running, biking, and swimming themselves are not particularly intellectually stimulating," - at this my dearest, I must disagree with you. Running and biking stimulate me much more than books or lectures or other things which people consider to be intellectually stimulating. Perhaps it's the way I'm made but nature and loveliness and the outdoors are stimulating to me in a way that is far above intellectual - I love the thoughts of God and His magnificent creation and all that the silence and restfulness that working out creates and would much rather spend days seeing and believing in such things over and above anything supposed intellectual learning I've ever had. But then again, I've always been a little different. :-)
Posted by: Tirzah at April 12, 2007 11:57 AMYou're BOTH right :-) I freak out when my mind and body aren't in the same place: if my mind's been working hard all day and is exhausted, I want my body to feel the same way. Similarly, after I've finished a really good workout (and taken a shower), I'm much more motivated to sit down and pound out some deep thoughts on the 'puter. "Anima sana in corpore sano," you know? :-)
How's your training going, Hooch? There's a super-sprint (VERY short) tri in Encinitas in a month -- want to do it? ;-)
Posted by: Kwin at April 19, 2007 10:14 AM